The basic unit of memory is a story - cause and effect. Originally tuned for survival, with the addition of imagination, stories are the bedrock of our lives.
Self esteem is a story:
- I am enough
- I’m quite certain I’m not enough
A tribe is a story:
- I work here
- These are my people
Even a culture is a series of stories woven together: this is who we are.
We follow many stories unconciously, and live our lives by these templates. It is through this reality that much therapy is done:
- Putting events in their right place
- Changing perspectives
- Updating a story to current times
This also means that the stories we fill our lives with can extend, and add to our instincts. They can take us to new places, or keep revisiting the old.
For this reason, I believe you should choose the stories you listen to, and take care to celebrate them & remind yourself of the one’s you wish to keep… and keep your ears hunting for surprises - you may just find a blind-spot, and the beginning of a new story.
If stories truly do run our lives, then I have a few thoughts for you:
- What new stories do you need in your life?
- What stories have pass their expiry date?
- …and what stories do you wish to celebrate?
As much as I like responses, your answers are yours alone, feel free to keep them that way. If you see no way forward, ask a friend or ask a therapist you like.
Take care.